A New Perspective to Anxious Attachment — a Catalyst in Healing, Worth Reading
Many struggle with Anxious attachment, which is rooted back to how you bonded to your parents at an early stage of childhood, manly a result due to a parent showing inconsistent care, unavailable and preoccupied. This childhood formed parental attachment bond transcends to adult phase, and human interactions in particular the romanic ones .
It result in an adult with a dysfunctional emotional fabric, anxiety, fear of abandonment and rejection, and challenges in regulating emotions back to baseline.
What would shift this, is reframing how you perceive the anxious attachment style you developed, is in this state of mind you think that you are obsessed with someone, need his/her validation, praise, recognition , their time, effort and investment in the relationship, you feel the need to be seen, heard, valued and appreciated.
What are you actually seeking is the return of your own energy that you have invested in them as opposed to keeping it in your own blood vessels and body, what you need is to use this trapped energy for your own progress in life
With the anxious attacehment stsyle, the mind makes you think that you need this person for survival, because anxity is a form of fight and fligt survival state of mind, hence you perceive them as if they are your life vessel and can’t survive without thier presence. They become the source of your inner peace and safety, so you prioritize them and put them first and do everything for them to meet and attend to their needs, you end up investing your time, your energy, money to the extend you become depleted and your cup run out of water, your energy will be sucked, your mind will be shattered impacting your inner peace and stillness , which will impact you energy level, sleep and appetite, no fire will be left, no light will shine from you because you got all this golden Life Chi energy trapped in your vessels, since it is not being reciprocated , thus intensifying your anxiety levels, pressure and physical psychological pain .
Where actually the energy you channel and fed them with, they took it and it made them shine , desirable and filled them with life. The pedistal that you put them on is the pedistal that you built. It is that energy and light that you have given them, what you miss is that energy; it is not the person that you grave, it is the energy, thus, reclaim your energy and say to yourself, that I am now reclaiming my energy from every person I have given to, in the most easiest and peaceful possible way.
Say this mantra to your self, people will even gravitate towards you, because of the preseved light and life valut energy that flows within you, glorifying you and the secure attachemnet you are examplifying, try it :)
